Jan 31st Second day with no pain meds

My leg hurts. I cannot get off the couch. Time begins to slow down. Tic toc. tic toc. Everything is a nightmarish blur. I try to eat my way to happiness or to sleep. I eat. I eat and I eat. It doesn't help me sleep, it just makes me fatter.

The second night was worse than the first. More tossing. More turning. More up and down pissing all fucking night. I take a valium at midnight, then toss and turn for hours on end. At 4am I take a zanax and continue to toss and turn.

The pain meds will not win. My name is Chip Knight, I cannot be defeated. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- and I cannot sleep.

I hope watching the sun rise will bring me peace and allow me to sleep. It's not to be.